Happy October! :)

Yes, there's a trend in my update post titles. I like it!
We've been staying pretty busy here, with soccer, chorus, girl scouts and now clarinet lessons and practice. Between all the church activities and the school activities, I'm not quite sure how I get anything else done! We're also moving in my Dh's really busy time, so for about the next 4 to 5 weeks we won't see much of him either. Which means, I can make chicken corn soup! (He despises it lol).

Other non-stitchy news quick.. We're doing Thanksgiving at my house this year. My MIL from Ohio, SIL and BIL are all coming *here* (squeak). I'm actually very excited and I've started planning my menus already. Hmm...what else.. oh yes--DD's top tooth FINALLY broke through! She only lost this thing before Halloween of LAST YEAR. She's been toothless for so long! But they are finally coming in-thank God.

Stitching news/Goals updates!
Considering I haven't posted goals here before, I'll just post my October goals:)
For October:
Stitch JN RR as soon as it arrives
Finish 1 model for shop, start on second
Stitch 10 hours on Stargazer
Restart MIL's gift
Stitch 2 Christmas Ornaments
Stitch 5 hours each on 2 other WIPS
Finish Crys' RR--Mail HOME
In recent finishes I have had several!

This was the ornament I stitched and finished for my first ever exchange on the Rotation BB. I'm wikked proud of it!

This is the biscornu I finished to send to nebbus! This was my first one, but I know it won't be my last! I was tickled to find a swarovski button to use too!!

The first part of my Christmas themed Just Nan RR! I'm really pleased with how it turned out, even if I had to rip out the satin stitches twice!

My part (and the final part) on my best friend Crystal's RR from a previous round. I love the spiderweb roses!

Two quick stitches! These are from Britty Kitties 3--gifts for my Gramma and my SIL.

last but not least by any means--this is the house I stitched on Autumn's Stitcher's Lane RR...it made it home quite a while ago!

I think that might be all for today! Y'all take care!

I've been tagged!

I was tagged by a silken thinker!
List seven songs you are into right now. No matter what the genre, whether or not they have words, or even if they're not any good, but they must be songs you're really enjoying now. Post these instructions in your blog along with your seven songs. Then tag seven other people to see what they're listening to.

1: Sexy Back by Justin Timberlake
2: SOS by Rhianna
3: How to Save a Life by the Fray
4: Sunday night football theme
5: U of Michigan fight song
6: To God be the Glory, Malcom Archer
7: Holy, Holy, Holy, Malcom Archer

I don't think enough people read this for me to tag! :)

Hugs and happy stitching!

Happy September!

I've really been lax about updating here... there's just so many other things I get drawn into doing!

The kid started school again and she's into 4th grade! It's amazing, and it was wonderful to watch her 'grow up' over the summer. There were some real strides into her becoming more mature, and more independant. She's *starting* to help more around the house, and starting to be a little less self-centered. I'm so so proud of her.

We started a walking program here. We're using Leslie Sansone's Walk Away The Pounds program. I have to say I *love* it. I haven't done any sort of fitness routine for well over a decade! It was a slow rough start as my muscles screamed bloody murder. However I'm up to doing the two mile workout almost every day now and I'm seriously proud of myself. Dan has been doing it with me and we're both amazed at how good (and sometimes sore) we feel!

I've only lost 3 pounds total--but that has more to do with being diagnosed as a severe asthmatic. Right now I'm on 2 different medications, by nebulizer, a total of 4 times a day. Blah! In July I was very sick.. and ended up going on prednisone for about 10 days--hence no major weight loss even though we've cut fat and carbs down majorly and I started excersizing. I'm really proud of the whole family to be honest. We are really working at the change!

I learned to thread and use my sewing machine over Labor Day Weekend!! I finished off two ornies by myself, so I was seriously thrilled! I'm not ready to make clothes yet, but I'm further than I have ever been!!

There's not much else going on here.. not much stitching, but I'm almost done Autumn's House RR... and then it's on to prep my JN RR. It's football season in full swing once again, so I'm starting to settle into my sunday stitching!

That's all for now! Take care everyone!

101 Things in 1001 Days.

This seems like a wonderful way to keep track of improvements, so here's mine!


The Mission:
Complete 101 preset tasks in a period of 1001 days.

The Criteria:
Tasks must be specific (ie. no ambiguity in the wording) with a result that is either measurable or clearly defined. Tasks must also be realistic and stretching (ie. represent some amount of work on my part).

Why 1001 Days?
Many people have created lists in the past - frequently simple goals such as new year's resolutions. The key to beating procrastination is to set a deadline that is realistic. 1001 Days (about 2.75 years) is a better period of time than a year, because it allows you several seasons to complete the tasks, which is better for organising and timing some tasks such as overseas trips or outdoor activities.

Start date August 21, 2006
End date: May 20, 2009

Health:
1. Start walking at least 2x per week for 3 months
2. Increase walking to 3x per week for 3 months.
3. Increase walking to 4x per week for 3 months.
4. Increase walking to 5x per week for duration.
5. Lose 25 pounds.
6. Lose 50 pounds (total)
7. Lose 100 pounds (total)
8. Lose 150 pounds (total)
9. Maintain treatment for bi-polar including medication therapy.
10. Find and try 1 new healthy recipe every 2 weeks.
11. Try 1 new food each month (vegetable, meat, etc)
12. Buy an Herb/Spice book and learn more about how to use them.
13. Go for 2 weeks with no soda 4 times.
14. Go for 1 week with no chocolate 6 times.
15. No eating out for 1 month.
16. Limit dining out to special occasions (anniversary, birthdays, good report cards)
17. Make monthly menu plans and use them to make grocery lists.
18. STICK to the monthly menu plans
19. Transfer all of my spread out recipes to cards in my recipe box.

Financial:
20. No Bounced checks
21. Pay off Van loan
22. Pay off 2 credit cards and freeze cards.
23. Pay off 2 more credit cards and freeze cards.
24. Pay off 2 more cards and freeze cards.
25. Stay on budget each month.
26. Save $3000
27. Refinance House
28. Increase contributions to 401K
29. Start investing some of our money.
30. Contribute to Tory's college fund no less than bimonthly.

Personal:
31. Tell everyone in my life I love them regularly.
32. Get back to regular church attendance (every Sunday)
33. Set aside 30 mins per day for devotions and quiet time
34. Send a letter to my grandmother 1x per week.
35. Call my gramma 1x per week.
36. Travel to England
37. Travel to Greece
38. Stop biting fingernails
39. Volunteer somewhere.
40. Visit 2 major art museums
41. Watch 5 black and white movies with my husband.
42. Have at least 1 'date night' a month with my husband.
43. Have a Mommy/daughter day once a month.
44. Read Pride & Prejudice
45. Read Gone with the Wind again.
46. Read 5 other "classic novels"
47. Attend a Patriots Home game.
48. Take my daughter to a NE Revolutions game.
49. See Bon Jovi in concert again.
50. Attend a Ballet Performance
51. Attend an Opera
52. Have a LOTR Extended Edition marathon (we've only been saying we should for over a year).
53. Make out my will.
54. Do a new family portrait at a GOOD photographer. (Not walmart/target)
55. Add two new faery statues to my collection
56. Attend the PA Faery weekend at least once

Household:
57. Put all silver change in a bucket and DO NOT USE IT (use for something nice for the family at the end of each calendar year)
58. Learn how and sew curtains for bedroom.
59. Sew curtains for kitchen.
60. Make a housecleaning schedule and stick to it for 30 days.
61. Declutter main bedroom.
62. Declutter Alex's bedroom
63. Declutter kitchen.
64. Donate all clothes that do not fit.
65. Clean out and haul trash from small room in basement
66. Clean out and haul trash from large room in basement.
67. Haul trash from furnace room in basement.
68. Paint Alex's room.
69. Paint Tory's room.
70. Replace front steps/porch
71. Replace bulkhead doors
72. Hang trim in living room.
73. Buy a new refrigerator.
74. Buy a new dishwasher.
75. Learn how to fix pipes under sink.
76. Buy a new bed for our bedroom.
77. Replace all of Tory's bedroom furniture.
78. Replace Alex's bed
79. Build a frame for Alex's bed.
80. Acquire a KitchenAid Mixer

Family:
81. Establish a family night each week even if it's a Saturday.
82. Watch at least 2 new movies per month.
83. Establish a chore list for each family member.
84. Attend all school events for both children.

Stitching:
85. Complete Taj Mahal Wip.
86. Complete Fairy Moon Wip.
87. Complete Stargazer Wip.
88. Complete Mystery 8 Wip.
89. Complete Faery Welcome.
90. Complete Medieval Times Wip
91. Frame 3 large finishes.
92. Stitch 6 ornaments per year (total would be 16 for this list).
93. Learn how to use my sewing machine.
94. Sew myself a skirt.
95. Learn how to finish my own ornaments.
96. Learn Hardanger Embroidery
97. Learn how to lace & frame.
98. Attend CATS once again.
99. Set stitching goals each month and track them.
100. Update this list at least once per month.
101. When 1001 days are over, make a new list, including carryover from this one that aren't completed.

No, I wasn't born here--pardon me.

I love lots of things about New England. The gorgeous autumn colors, the mild summers. I love the culture and history. However, I totally hate the insular nature of the small towns. I live in such a small town. THere's a saying in New England that if you weren't born here, and your momma wasn't born here, and her momma and so on and so on.. well if you weren't and they weren't then you just don't belong. They aren't kidding.

I live in a tiny sleepy lake town. Most of the mothers don't work, and those who do tend to own their own businesses. They have 2.5 children, big homes with landscape they did themselves thankyouverymuch, and their children started activities as soonas they could walk. They all know each other from countless hours at swimming, karate, gymnastics, dance and music lessons. Their children who are of similiar age bonded early, and tightly. A great foundation, and a good life for the kids. So what's wrong with that you ask?

Well it makes it really difficult for someone who wasn't born here, didn't start kindergarten here, and is just a little bit different from the New England mentality to "belong". And it makes me just a little angry. Because the attitudes don't orginate with the children. They had to learn the 'outsiders are bad' somewhere... and the finger points straight to the parents. In Bold Neon Colors. It's just heartbreaking to watch your daughter be on the outside of every group because a: she wasn't born here, and b: she's just slightly different. She talks differently, and she doesn't live the life of privilege like they do.

Same things occur to DH and I, but I truely don't care. There was a time in which I cared deeply who liked me, hell I wanted everyone to like me. Now, I don't care. Take me as I am, flawed and mistake ridden, or don't take me at all. Thank heavens that GOD doesn't care that I'm flawed. Thank God for loving us all no matter what defects we have--seen or unseen.

So for now I'll teach my daughter that acceptance at every level for others is what we strive for, and hope and pray for the day we can move to a city. Where she can start fresh, without the history of this small, snotty town.

Playing Catch up

Greetings everyone!
Somedays I think I need to get to this blog and update it and then I always seem to run out of time! Although I'm not sure it's time I run out of, or I just have figured out more ways to use it, and less of those ways center around the computer.

We got back last night from driving to Ohio to visit my mother in law. It was nice to go out there for a week for 'no reason'. Nothing was wrong, just a vacation with her... I had missed her so much and DH had been back several times, and of course we saw her in March. But this was wonderful! She has an inground pool in her backyard, and I'm pretty sure Tory spent at least 6 hours a day in it. We timed our visit to coincide with Tor's 9th birthday (WHEN did that happen??) since my MIL typically hasn't been around for the kids' birthdays. Our son turned 17 on July 19th, so we celebrated together. She is so amazing to us... she took Tory to COSI, the Lucas County Fair, the Toledo Zoo, and gave her tickets to a Mud Hens day game. The really really cool part about that game (which her father took her to) was that they were playing the Pawtucket Red Sox!! How cool was that?? She built a faery house at the corner of her Grammy's garden with her dad too.. but I didn't get a picture :( Bad Mom!! LOL

I also had a neat experience while we were there (besides LOTS of relaxation). My husband and son took me to the Toledo Museum of Art. That might not sound like much to some of you, but I have never in my life been to an art museum. We spent HOURS there, I was so fascinated with seeing the works of artists I've only read about, and getting up close and personal with tapestries and old needlepoint hangings. I loved seeing my first Van Gogh, Cezanne, Dega, Holbein, Rosetti and Gainsborough. Countless other things fascinated and kept me there, and I reveled in the walk through the ancient art section... where for the first time I actually saw Egyptian artifacts, Etruscan vessels, ancient Roman cups and more. I could have spent many many more hours there gazing at the Cloister walls and art, and the entire room they have there from the Chateau de Chenailles, France from about 1650. My favourite painting (today--tomorrow could change!) was most definately Ophelia by Arthur Hughes. I could go on and on about it, it was that profound an experience for me. Another time I will probably devote an entire post to the art I got to see. DH and I had a lot of quality down time together while my MIL was frolicing with her grandkids, and it was lovely. We got to sleep in, had midnight swims together in the pool, snuggled watching movies and just generally destressed. It was nearly as important as anything else this last week.

Tory spent the week away at sleep-away camp and LOVED it. She was ready to come home though as much as I was ready to have her here. It was wierdly quiet without her here in the house, but I got a LOT accomplished, including cleaning out her room completely. I dumped all the old crap out of it, moved it around and now it is a MUCH nicer room. We're going to redecorate it over the coming year as we can afford to get the new furniture we've picked out! It's time for her to have a more grown up room. I'm contemplating getting her a TV for it for christmas this year, but I'm not sure.

Stitching news ? Well, I have had 3 finishes this month, but I can show you none of them yet! As soon as they arrive at their final destinations, I'll put up the pics! :)

August is going to be just as busy as July and June have been! We have a few days off, and then Tory starts GS Day Camp next Monday, then Bible school the third week of August. She starts school again on the 28th, so we'll start getting ready with clothes, supplies, etc that week too. I have to fit in haircuts for us all, and shoe shopping too. I have a bunch of stitching goals, AND housecleanin goals! We'll see!

Until I have time again to write a long catch up post ( I'm sure!) God Bless, take care of yourselves and your loved ones, and Smile!!

Summer Vacation!

Well, the kid is finally done with school! We have an action packed summer planned, for her at least! She's doing drama day camp, week-long sleepaway camp, we're driving to Ohio and back, she'll do girl scout day camp, and then Bible school! If I could find a day camp and afford it for next week--she'd be in it! She got pretty good grades, although her math dropped significantly. The teacher sent a summer review book home, so we'll work on that a few times a week (as recommended).

She's doing good with her cast, although it's staying on a bit longer than we expected. They changed her yesterday to a waterproof cast, and this comes off on July 7th. Which is good because she leaves July 15th for sleepaway camp, where she's getting riding lessons. She'll have to wear a brace for a month or so, since the bones are more fragile due to them having to straighten themselves. At least no more taping her up with duct tape to shower, and she can swim!!

I've managed to get a cold! I was rarely sick this winter, but now I've got one horrid cold!! Sore throat, cough, sniffles--the whole gamit. This comes right on the heels of having to have a tooth pulled last Friday because of an infection!

I have been stitching obsessively again. As a result, I have two finishes this week! Those will come in a minute. I also reorganized my WIPs and realized I really really want to get some of this stuff finished. So I posted a StRIP list on the Rotation BB, and set myself some (I think realistic) goals. So here are my finishes!

This is Drawn Thread's The Birth Band. Stitched for my godson. This is a JOY to stitch, and so pretty!


This one is Teacher Gift from Annalee Waite Designs. I finished something else for her teacher this year, so I'm all set for 4th grade!!

Taller than any Tall Man

Dear Ray,

I can hardly believe that it has been a year that we said goodbye to you. It was just yesterday I was meeting you for the first time--nervous, scared and oh so hopeful you would approve of your son's choice. You welcomed me with a hug, and that darling smile. What you lacked in height, you more than made up for in love, strength, joy and pride in your family. I can remember laughing with you, getting to know you, growing to love you--it was all just yesterday.

Sometimes I have to catch myself, and remember I can't pick up the phone to share something with you. The old adage of 'time heals', while true, it isn't completely honest. Neither time nor distance can change anything when something reminds me of you, or I focus on a collection of pictures of you. Those days I miss you so much it hurts just as much as it did a year ago. Even more so when Alex does something so grown up that it startles us, or watching Tory grow into her smarts, and get excited about learning something new. It is those times, especially, that I miss you the most.

Your presence is here though. I feel it so often, know that you watch us and love us all still. In fact, with your far flung children, it's probably much easier now! I know you were at our Wedding Blessing in October. We both felt you there, and took so much joy from it. I know you were there when I was Confirmed, and I wish I could have shared that moment with you just as I shared my journey. It was amazing to realize you had traveled the same path as an adult, and your wisdom meant so much to me then. Even as it does now.

Your grandson is growing up to be such a good man. Amazingly he'll be 17 this summer, and I am so grateful we put so much effort into your being here for his 8th grade graduation. He's seemed to settle into school, getting good grades, planning a thoughtful future. But I know he misses you so much. He plays the CD's of guitar music that were yours, and plays his guitar, and I know he thinks of you often. You have so many more reasons to be proud of him-- I know you were.

I never told you how overjoyed and thrilled that I was when you loved Tory just as your own. She was so happy to have another set of grandparents, and she adored you. I never thanked you for opening your heart to her the way you did. Anyways, in typical Tory fashion, she has lost tons of teeth, grown none of them back yet--and managed to break her wrist this year. I can't help but think you were there when she wrecked, since she should have hit her head. She misses you so much too, and asks me often if I think you are watching over us. I tell her of course, and when we lost one of our cats, she started comforting herself by saying "Well I bet Shai is playing with Grandpa Ray." Oh Ray thank you so much for loving her and giving her such confidence in her family's love.

And your son misses you more than he is ever willing to say out loud. I catch him looking at your pictures, when he doesn't think I'm looking. He has come so far Ray. He felt your absence so strongly in the midst of his 40th birthday. We stayed in the same hotel we all spent Thanksgiving in, and it was hard for him because I knew he was picturing you reading in the armchair. I know you were already so proud of him Ray, but he says he is working on becoming more of the man you saw in him... more of the man his father would have been proud of.

As for me Ray, you were far more than a father-in-law. You were so accepting, so giving, so loving. Your loss left a hole in my heart, because I never was able to tell you directly how much you meant to me. I didn't realize it myself. I know you knew, but I wish I had said it out loud. The way you lived your life Ray, inspired and inspires me. I'm not that good at it all yet, but I try everyday.

It is so amazing how your life changes in the timespan of a year. Things that were so important, so crucial become things that aren't so vital anymore. Petty hurts, grudges, the past. And how other things, that you may not have been so good at, or so devoted to--become a focus of your life. Church, family, gentleness, honor, love.

We try to live as you lived Ray. Live Life on Life's Terms. Do the Next Right Thing. Know that sometimes is more important to be happy than it is to be right. You taught me-more than my own family ever could have-how important *family* is. How to cherish and nurture those bonds, because at the end of the day that is the most precious thing we have. Your passion and intensity for life showed us that no matter the trials, no matter the hurdles, no matter the work--staying true to yourself and your family is most important. And that no matter the issue, it can be done. You were a generous and kind, wise and loving, intelligent and playful, and loyal man.

Thank you for your inspiration, your unshakable faith in us, and most importantly--your unwavering love.

Taller than any Tall Man by far.
I love you.

What a May!!

What a whirlwind month this has been!! Whew! This is going to be a picture packed blog, trying to catch up with all that has happened this month!

I spent a glorious two weeks in PA with my best friend and my godson! I forgot how snuggly and loving newborns are! And since he is much smaller than my own nearly 9 year old baby, I constantly marveled at his size! I think when Crys handed him to me I said "My goodness I've stuffed bigger turkeys!" He is an adorable baby and so sweet. My nickname for him is Guppy, and he was starting to mimic the fish-face I was doing to him by the time I left! Here is my favorite picture:


I got home late on a Saturday night, and that Monday my energetic daughter was bike riding with a neighbor when she, according to the boy "flipped her bike". It was one of those mom moments, as I was running down the lane and picking her up off the road, that I knew something serious was wrong. After an evening spent in the ER, we came home with one broken wrist, several probable cracked ribs, an 8 year old who was starting to resemble an old banana she had so many bruises, and two very grateful parents. She wasn't wearing her helmet, and I shudder to think where we'd be if she'd hit her head. Thank God and her guardian angels for that! She's devastated that her softball season is over. We're thinking about seeing if we can hire a coach for some lessons in late summer and winter because she has serious talent. So here's a shot of her cast..when she finishes getting it signed, I'll post a new picture of that. Of course, she got hot pink!


Somewhere in all that, I finished something! I finally finished Mirabilia's Christmas Elf Faery! I stitched her on a Country Stitch Kiwi Illusions, and changed the Mill Hill beads to Delicas. It gives it a MUCH more subtle look, but I love it. This is my first sizable finish this year for myself, so I'm pretty thrilled!!


Finally this month! I finally worked up my courage to go pick up Shai's ashes at our vet's office, and waiting for us was a note. The vet has been thinking of us, and wanted me to know that they had had a stray mom brought in, pregnant. She'd had kittens and all but 2 of them had a home. Well... I wasn't sure, but I thought okay-let's look at them. I took one look at them and was lost. It almost seemed as if this were the time, and while I miss Shai so so much... I know he would love that we all were laughing and loving new babies that needed a good home. We brought them home on Friday night, and it's been such a joy. Kittens are SO entertaining! So without further ado... meet:
Smudgers:

And... Dante:

So that's been my May! I hope yours was just as eventful and happy!
God Bless!

Friends are the family your heart chooses...

This is the wording on my most precious piece of cross stitch. It hangs in my living room, and it was a recent birthday gift from my best friend, Crystal. When Crys and I tally up all the years we've known each other, we usually stop because it reminds us how old we are! We have been friends for over 23 years. My mother once said to me when I was small "If you make 1 lifelong friend, you are rich." She was right.

Crystal and I have experienced it all! Our first broken hearts came in high school, where we were called the "Bobbsey Twins" by some of our teachers. Amusing since Crystal is tall, dark and beautiful, while I am as I always have been—short and fat! But we were always together, we went everywhere together, were each other's biggest champions. We've only fought 1 time, in nearly 24 years… and that was in 10th grade!! We went to different colleges, and typically weren't in touch as much as either of us would have liked. She finished and moved onto a good job in our hometown area, I didn't finish and moved to Philadelphia with a fiancé. Again we weren't in as much touch as either of us liked, but I know I could have called her at 3 am and she would have been there.

I moved even further, to North Carolina and had my daughter. There was no one else ever I could think of that I would want raising her if something should happen to me, so Crystal is Tory's godmother. I moved home to PA when Tory was just barely 2, and amazingly (and not a little frighteningly) Crys and I discovered we both were reading the same types of books (sometimes the SAME book) and… we'd both been bitten HARD by the counted cross stitch bug. It led into this whole whirlwind of experiences… I discovered hand dyed fabrics, floss, specialties.. all those things first because as a stay at home mom, I had more time. Crystal had no children… well no official kids!

When I moved home, and was terrified about being a single mother, Crystal promised me I might be a single woman, but I was never going to be a single parent. Crys has co-parented my daughter with me, and even now still helps when things get tense. Crystal's opinion of my now husband was far more important to me than the opinions of my own parents. There is nothing she does not know about me, or my past. She knows all of my dreams, she knows all of my faults, she knows all of my failings. And she loves me anyways. When I had to have ankle fusion surgery and be in a wheelchair for four months, Crystal was the one who brought me home from the hospital and came out every night for a month to give my 4 year old a bath. When six months later, my doctor told me my hopes for more children were never going to happen, Crystal held me while I sobbed out how unfair it was. And Crystal drove me to the hospital for my hysterectomy.

When she was having struggles, she would come to me and I would just listen. She cried on my should just as much about things. And I was one of the first she called about her surprising pregnancy.

We both cried on the phone as she'd never really wanted children, and I desperately wanted more. She said "well you know this baby will be yours too," and she meant that with her whole heart. It's the only time I've regretted being 7 hours drive away. When Crystal's son was born on Saturday, April 29… she was not the only one crying tears of joy for a much welcomed and very much wanted little boy. I cannot wait to get to her house next Monday and hug her and tell her how very proud I am of her. It's usually the other way around. We're going to finish up the nursery, and I'm going to get to watch her be the most incredible mother. And somewhere in there, I'll get to know my godson. Yeah, my godson.

If you've never had a friend like this, you can't understand it. You might think any number of things. And for those who don't have a friend that they trust enough to call at 8 am, laying in bed, basically unclothed and say " I can't move, my back is out. Come help me dress so we can call an ambulance," for someone who doesn't have a friend that they never care if they are naked, or bitchy, or pms'ing, or whatever… then you can't understand.

And Crystal? Happy Mother's Day.. your first official! I am SO proud of you. Welcome Christopher.. you are much loved, and adored already!

The beat goes on...

Hi y'all... yes I'm still here (well, I don't know if anyone missed me lol). It's been a whirlwind month since my last entry.

Today is 4 calendar weeks since we lost Shai, and it will be a month on the 29th. I never expected a little furbaby to affect my life in such a profound way, but he did, and is. I got the call from the vet to pick up his ashes before my trip but just didn't have the heart to go do that yet. I will tomorrow I think.

We just got back from 5 days in PA where I helped host a baby shower for my very best friend, Crystal. (she's crystal622 on ezboards). She's nominally due May 12th, but I'm pretty sure, as are her dr's, that she won't go quite that long. I'll be headed back down there for a 2 week stay (just by myself whee!!!) to help her with the lil one. I'm really excited about that!

I also had the chance to go see my grandmother while we were home. I haven't seen her since Christmas, and as she's not doing great, I wanted to make sure she and Tory and I all got together. It was incredible to see her light up when she saw my daughter, and how much Tory loves her 'Old Grammy'. My grandma has always been a steadying force in my life, and it's been rough to see how little she's becoming. She is still cross stitching (stamped stitching, but I have lovely pillowcases she's made me) and she does a stem stitch that you can barely see anything but a straight line!! She'll be 80 in September! It meant so much to hug her and hold her hand for an hour. We also got this picture:

Gramma is worse than I am about pictures, and rarely looks at the camera!!

See y'all soon.. take care of yourselves

At the Rainbow Bridge...

waiting for us, will be a great kitty. He was funny, and entertaining. He was loving and warm, and I will miss him snuggling onto the green fleece blanket behind my head when I was stitching. We had to put my little blonde cat Shai to sleep today, and we buried him with the green fleece he loved so much. I just pray he is happy playing in the sunshine, and I'm grateful he is in no more pain.

You were much loved Shai. I miss you.

Amazing Weekend!

We got home late last night from Boston where DH's brother, sister, and Mom along with obviously my BIL's wife gathered to celebrate, albeit a few days early, his 40th birthday! It was *amazing*

His mom so generously hosted us in the Doubletree Suites, and even insisted we have room service breakfast in bed on Saturday morning. The room was-imagine this-a beautiful suite with a huge, comfy king size bed, lots of pillows and NO KIDS! We checked in and then met his mom and sister, then waited for his brother to guide us to a nice-if noisy!- Mexican restaurant, The Border Cafe in Cambridge. Delicious food, but a bit spicy for me. I have a very mild taste tolerance, unlike my brother in law who regularly has his Indian cuisine spiced "crazy hot" and goes to Hotter than Hell Night at a local Cambridge spot East Coast Grill. We all piled back to the hotel and just spent a few hours catching up before we all went to bed.

It was lovely to sleep in until 9:00 am, and then enjoy breakfast tucked in with my handsome husband. After that it was off for a day of wandering around Harvard Square, people watching, and some window and not so window shopping. I found an incredible bead store that I will have to revisit soon! The weather was gorgeous, sunny and perfect. Then back to the hotel to rest and change for the 'offical' birthday dinner! We went to Maggiano's Little Italy... a poignant place for us all, as the first offical gathering of the families after I moved, and my now SIL moved in with DH's brother was at Thanksgiving a little more than 3 years ago. Memories and thoughts of Ray were strong, and while he was very much missed at the celebrations, we all could feel him there. The food was excellent!

Sunday bright and early I was up and in the car, zipping back to NH to pick up the kids and take them into Boston so they too could see the family! While it made for a long day, it was so very worth it! Far too soon it was time to see DH's sister off to her flight back, and then the rest of us went to Boston Beer Works for really good burgers!

It was a great weekend.. and the gimmick Dh's family came up with was to give him about 40 presents for his birthday! There were great things there, plus some funny gifts like a "grow your own duck"... some sort of sponge thing! Celebrations continue all this week and into the coming weekend, with a close family friend coming up from NYC on Friday for the weekend!

No stitching this weekend, but I'm about to head off to my spot now! Y'all take care!

Good week!

Boy it's been a busy week, but a great one! I got another little envelope in the mail from my SS, and she says I'm going to need all these lil flossies. Hmmm.... I'm intrigued!
DD has been busy, doing DI and Girl Scouts. She's got her DI competition coming up this month, on the 25th. I volunteered to be a judge because each team needs an adult volunteer... We'll see what they have me doing! She's pretty excited, she and her team have been working for 6 months on their challenge!
We're going out of town this weekend for DH's birthday. His mom and siblings are hosting us in Boston, as it's his 40th :) I've been busy all week plotting, cleaning, and now packing.
I am amazed that when I went down to my laundry room to work on laundry, there's hardly any down there! I wasn't sure that was even possible, to be totally caught up on laundry!! Yay!
Not much stitching this week, but I'm hoping to have some down time this weekend in the hotel!
Y'all take care!

Busy Busy Busy...

I realized it'd been longer than I liked since I updated my blog! :) Things have been wikkid busy around here lately, getting ready for Dan's 40th birthday party, school, etc. DD's events are starting to take off too, so my evenings are starting to get even busier!
I started Mirabilia's The Stargazer--not that I *needed* another WIP, mind you. I keep telling Dan "Need has nothing to do with it!". I am however working on setting up that rotation I talked about earlier, and see what happens. Stargazer, like so many other Mira's, isn't true to color in her picture. I'm loving it so far though! Here's my progress:

Cleanin' house day!

Yeap, Wednesdays are my house cleanin day! I used to *hate* it because we weren't all that good at keeping the day to day stuff put away so I could clean when it was time. I spent all my time playing catch up with putting this thing and that thing away. But we've really done a lot to reorganize the house, and work at keeping it cleaned up. Don't get me wrong, I'm not a neat freak, and I doubt my house will ever *always* be company ready--at least not *all* of it. We still have some ways to go in getting our bedroom more organized. Today, however I was able to start early this morning and I scrubbed everything in the kitchen, then swept and scrubbed the floor. I cleaned the kids' bathroom, dusted and swept my living room, and did several loads of laundry. It felt awesome that I could just get going, and not have to "pick up" before I cleaned up.

I worked some on the Band Sampler RR I've got that's due to be mailed Monday. My goal is to have it done Friday. I also think I may be honing in on narrowing down my WIPs to my rotation list. I'm not going to try to rotate through all 36, that'd be silly. I think I'll go with the 'slots' recommendation I got on the Rotation BB. Sounds like I could possibly handle this type of a rotation!

Off to make Chicken Ceasar's for dinner! Y'all take care!

Keep on keepin on!

Well we survived vacation week, rather well I think! The alien is back to school, and I'd revel in my alone time if I weren't sick again! I've been much luckier this year, but I think I'm losing my voice again...

I really am thrilled with how focused I was during the Chatelaine Stitching Olympics! I got 8 out of my 12 goals completed, and am further along on several WIPs! We've started setting monthly goals on the Chatelaine BB, and I think this will really work for me! I'm also trying to figure out a rotation, and will implement that starting in April! I'm confidant I can get several things finished this year!

That's really all from me today, ya'll take care!

There's a baby shower!

My best friend is pregnant, and while it wasn't a planned pregnancy, it's a great thing! She's predicted to have a boy, and so all the way from NH to PA I'm helping plan her baby shower. She was so instrumental in doing my baby shower that I am so excited to do this for her. I'm also going to go down there for 2 weeks after little Christopher is born to help her out. Just like she's godmom to my little one, and like a second mom... I expect that's much how I'll be for him.

It's been so fun to crawl all over the internet and search for baby shower games, finger food recipes, and ideas for cute little favors!! It's also easier knowing that he's probably a boy... when we did my shower, we knew the alien was a girl :) There's an awesome bakery up here I want to get to make her cake.

It's snowing again here *blah* and my throat is still sore, but I've been using the down time to work in my Chatelaine stitching goals. After the Olympics are over, I'm going to set up a *gasp* rotation!! I know I know, but with 35 WIPs... I kinda need to!!

Take care of yourselves!!

We're Being Sued!!

We live on a private road, in a fairly undeveloped part of our small town. Now town zoning ordinances state that no new construction can be done on any parcel of land less than 3 acres. That's important here. We got a packet yesterday from an attorney, stating that we-along with all our neighbors here in this little area-are being sued by a gentleman who owns 65 acres of land up higher in this area. He wants to build a subdivision up there, with 19 houses on *20* acres, leave the rest for conservation, and is suing all of us for access rights to the road.

This packet came with copies of *every* original deed, all the proposed plans, and everything dating back to 1963 for pity's sake! I don't speak legalese, but it seems to me that all our deeds were written that we owned to the 'center line of the private road' so our access rights couldn't be taken away. So we have to appear in court in May!! I mean I don't even KNOW my neighbors!! But I know I don't want 19 houses back there. I'd lose my small deer family that visits me every spring, and the fox who suns himself on my huge rock in my front yard. I think the raccoons might not run away, but they surely wouldn't amble across my driveway! And I sure don't want 30 more cars coming up and down this road!

Ahh well... it sure makes life more interesting!! LOL What will happen will happen. I was just shocked to see we were named in the suit! Wonder if he'd want to buy our property? Hmmmmm.....

Y'all take care of yourselves!

Warm again!

We're home, and the power is back thank heavens! Everyone survived well, the pipes are intact, the cats burrowed. We only lost the fridge and freezer of food. Small price for when the temps were below 20 degrees!!! Tory watched a lot of curling on the hotel TV... I took stitching but just didn't manage to do it. Today I'm rising threads for Chatelaines, including some I never rinsed the threads for before!! Wow do those reds bleed!

So I decided to create a Johari window, after seeing them on several blogs. I have to confess I wasn't brave enough to create the Nohari window. I know I have a bunch of failings, but God knows I am not secure enough to hear the negative that others think about me! So here's the link to my Johari Window: http://kevan.org/johari?name=faeryxstitcher

Tory is home now for a week from school, February vacation! It was nice to sleep that extra 30 minutes this morning!

Speaking of the kid, I'm off to make lunch!! Be good to yourselves!

Wind, and more wind!

Well, I'm writing this from the warm (thank GOD) Fairfield Inn. It's quite comfy, and thanks to Dan's laptop, we can get online to check email and let everyone know where we are. The power went out on Friday, and our electric company says it might not be until Monday or Tuesday that our power will come back on.

Yeap. Tuesday. Maybe.
We had to sleep in the house last night, because we got home late and everyone in our county had an 8 hour jump on hotel rooms on us. WOW was that cold! We all burrowed under covers together, but it's not something I'd like to do again! We quickly packed, and off we came to the hotel. The very busy hotel!

I'm worried about losing everything in my fridge and freezer. I JUST went grocery shopping! And I hope the cats are burrowed into our down comforter, it's the only thing that saved US last night!

Y'all take care of yourselves!

New Look!!

Good Morning! Well, thanks to Olde Glory Designs, run by Cathy I have a new Blog format! I LOVE it, Cathy is so so talented!! I have not blogged regularly now for quite some time, and I miss it! I'll be here more than before, with most of my boring life! :)

In stitchy news today, I finished part 1 of Chatelaine's Midi Mystery 1! I set that as one of my Olympic goals and I've gotten it done! Seems like a small thing to get happy about but I'm so tickled I've made progress!!

Ya'll take care!

There Was Much Unspoken...

In any life, there are always things said and unsaid. Things done and left undone. Too many times, there is too much unsaid and undone. Once more, a young life has been cut short, and we are left to say and do what we can to ease each other's pain.

Laura, you were vibrant, full of life, and always a pleasure. We were brought together by the love of one particular designer, and together we worked to bring a bulletin board upwards. I will always remember your laugh, and the joy you had in stitching. I always envied your speed, and beautiful projects. Knowing you had Royal Holiday as a WIP, I know every stitch I put in mine will remind me of you. We may not have always seen eye to eye on some things, but we always were able to be friends.

I hope you are at peace now Laura, and with our merciful Lord.

How I wish I could stop time...

This has been one heck of a week... My grandmother was finally diagnosed officially with Alzheimer's and is now living in a home so we know she'll be taken care of. I hope that by the time I can get to PA again, she'll still know me. But if she doesn't, all I pray is that she is in a happy place in her mind.

My mom's best friend, and second mother to me died on Monday. She was so much a part of my life when I needed someone to help me interpret adult, and to help my parents understand teenager. I didn't know she was so sick, but pancreatic cancer is like that. I wish I could make it for the funeral, I don't see how that's possible right now. And it just brings back the sense of loss I've had since June. God speed and God Bless Sharon. I love you.

Fundraiser Time again!

What a year it's been! With getting Tory stable this year, and how awful her experiences she had with kids in her class last year, she remembers how wonderful she felt being a the high salesperson in her grade last year. She told me that some of the kids are hoping she is high sales again and are rooting for her, she said. The sparkle was back in her eyes, and with the summer we've had, that hasn't been there in a while. So I'm putting the info out there again if anyone would like to help her-she would be so excited and grateful! The orders have to be in on September 26th. As far as I remember, shipping is pretty hefty, so if you just want something small I'll be happy to add onto my physical order :) The wrapping paper is very worth it though!

Here's the link:
http://www.innisbrook.com/acb/basket/index_child_reg.cfm?internet_id=I51805B&DID=7

If that doesn't work, please email me if you're interested, and I'll email you and send you the info. Thanks so much!

And more wonderous mail...

Well this seems to be my week :)I got a lovely little thing in the mail again yesterday. I certainly wasn't expecting anything. I pulled a thick yellow envelope from my box addressed to me from The Stash Fairy. Now I know a few Stash Fairys, but none of them really are on good terms with me since I stopped acquiring stash at my past rate (faerys don't do abstinence well so it seems), so I wasn't sure what this was.

I opened it up and out fell Liz Turner Diehl's 15th Century European Medieval Herb Garden Chart. Wow. And not only was it a chart I've longed for for some time, it was signed.... to me. Double wow. A small note to me from the sweet person who did this just let me know I should enjoy, and that was that.

Honestly, it has been a bang-on week for mail for me. Stash Fairy, whomever you are disguised as this week--Thank you from the bottom of my heart. You brought a bright smile to my face this day. The chart is lovely, and the thought that went into having the designer sign it, and having it personalized warms me to the core. You are truly special.

Take care of yourselves.

Sometimes it's the little things...

I love to get mail. E-mail, snail mail. It doesn't really matter, if it's mail i love to get it. There's always a little thrill I guess, waiting to see if there's the pleasure of hearing from someone or getting an unexpected surprise, or even just learning about something for the first time (like from my husband's obsession with Scientific American).

But it's the totally unexpected, that is the most incredble, I think. Like the package I got this week. I'd been sick with some silly bug I caught from my stepson, and hadn't gotten to the mail for a few days. On Saturday we finally made it to the post office, and there's a package for me. I wasn't expecting anything since I'm not buying any cross stitch stuff now, so it was surprising. The return address was a familiar one, a friend I count as a good and close one. I smiled, wondering what was in store for me. What spilled into my lap brought tears to my eyes.

See, on August 28th, I was baptized. Myself, with 8 babies in my church. It was a sight to behold lol. It was done with little fanfare, but much meaning, and I told very few people. And my friend sent me some blessed things to mark this important day for me. A beautiful Rosary, a Celtic prayer book, and some other things of faith. It matters not I don't share her exact beliefs, these things are gorgeous, and I am so blessed she cared enough to send them.

On a weekend I was facing the financial woes of heating my home this winter with the cost of heating oil soaring through the roof, it was a much welcomed "little blessing". Thank you so much.

Some Gems...

Stolen from a Garden Princess (wonder if she'll notice!)

No one can ruin your day without YOUR permission.
Most people will be about as happy as they decide to be.
Others can stop you temporarily, but only you can do it permanently.
Whatever you are willing to put up with is exactly what you will have.
Success stops when you do.
When your ship comes in...make sure you are willing to unload it.
You will never "have it all together."
Life is a journey...not a destination. Enjoy the trip!
The biggest lie on the planet: "When I get what I want, I will be happy."
The best way to escape your problem is to solve it.
I've learned that ultimately, "takers" lose and "givers" win.
Life's precious moments don't have value unless they are shared.
If you don't start, you certainly won't arrive.
We often fear the thing we want most.
He or she who laughs, lasts.
Yesterday was the deadline for all complaints.
Look for opportunities, not guarantees.
Life is what's coming...not what was.
Success is getting up one more time.
Now is the most interesting time of all.
When things go wrong...don't go with them.

Tidbits to live by!

Wow, is my schedule full!!

I'm doing PTO and by all accounts the first part of the year is hell... With church activities, and the fact that I don't and haven't had time to search for a co-leader... I'm really re-evaluating my ability to lead GS this year. I just don't want the girls disappointed. I'm not sure i'm all that good at it anyways. I'm hoping when I call the new Brownie leader I'll hear someone has said something :) That way I can gracefully withdraw without harm to the girls.

Regrets...

Losing my FIL without ever *really* telling him how much I loved him, respected him, and how grateful I was to him has made me really examine my life. Do the people I care about know it? Have I done things I need to make amends for? Are there things I feel I deserve amends for that just don't matter anymore?

The answer is a resounding yes on the last 2, and Lord I hope so on the first one. It has also left me with a whole bunch of regrets...

I regret...
-I was never able to have a second child when I still possibly could have.
-I have a horrid temper
-that there are people I have hurt over the years that I cannot find to make amends.
-that there are those I am fighting with that we cannot see our way clear to fix it.
-I do not spend more time stitching
-I do not call my grandmother enough.
-I am not always the wife I want to be
-I certainly am not the best at cleaning my house.

My reflections have also left me with a profound sense of gratitude and celebration! We are so lucky in this world, whatever-where ever we are.

I celebrate...
-My beautiful, smart, funny, witty and oh so sweet daughter.
-The 3 years I had with my Father In Law.. thank You Ray.
-My husband, without whom I would be lost and half of myself.
-lifelong friends who forgive me nearly anything-thank you Crys.
-friends I can be totally candid with and who love me anyways-thank you Misty, Cathy, Stacey & Niki. I love you.
-other close friends I am not sure they'd be okay with their names here :)
-Being poor, having been on welfare, and a single mom. It makes me more grateful than I can express for my bounty now.
-My return to God. I cannot imagine having survived the last 3 months without the embrace of God comforting me.

I know there are so many more of both regrets and celebrations. These are the ones I think of now as I cry tears of sorrow and joy. Take care of yourselves.

Angi

The March of Time...

Well we're 1/3rd of the way into August, and I can't help but marvel at how fast the summer seems to have flown by. June disappeared into sadness, a funeral and grief that not even my birthday on July 3rd could pull me out of. July was spent working so hard at trying to be okay, that I forgot to do a traditional thing for my baby's 8th birthday on July 24th-a week I was trapped in PA with parents I'm never going to be a good enough Mom for.

We got back just in time for the alien to start GS Camp-yeap the camp I helped fight so hard for. I'm still trapped in my own sadness, I'm not sure when this gets easier? I hope it does, that's for sure! Right now, my excitement seems limited to watching the panda baby and mom at the National Zoo! That's truly sad, I know!

**** WARNING!! Sappy Proud Mom Moment Follows!! ****

I had a moment this past spring, when spring school pictures came out. These are always the "better" pictures-nice backrounds, posed, etc. When we got the pictures back this year-that was no 'little' girl staring at the camera with a confidant " I can conquer the world with my smile" expression on her face. That was a young lady, with an clear vision swimming there of the teen she will become. I was heartbroken. Where did the baby go?? She's tall now, and I HOPE she'll be taller than my own 5'3 1/4". I cling to that quarter inch, I assure you! She's outgrown shoes I got her this JUNE already-we had the joy of beginning school shopping this weekend. I have a feeling she's getting ready to spurt a few more inches. But she is growing up, so fast. Too fast, it seems to me.

She got CD players for her birthday-a desk one from my parents, and a portable from Daddy :) She also got tons of CD's. She goes *nowhere* without her headphones on now, and drifts to sleep with music. Again, a vision of the future. We were at the bookstore yesterday, she was picking out a CD and 4 books to use her birthday money on. A woman there, a teacher, was stunned such a young girl would choose to read, instead of say video games, or some such. We don't have a PS2, or gamecube, or any of the other game consoles in the house, nor will we ever. There are books on every available surface it seems, and to this household, reading is as important as breathing. My little crafty one also recognized the young woman was crocheting, which impressed the lady more.

So my ramble comes to this...I guess we're doing something right. Miss Thing is polite to adults, curteous in public and well (and soft) spoken. She reads voraciously (she just started Harry Potter 1 and is almost done), and she loves to write stories and cross stitch and color. She's improved in cleaning up after herself, and picking up her room. She even helps in the kitchen now. I'm so proud of the young girl she is becoming. She exceeds even my dreams of her.

She is, in my husband's words... Glorious.

I saw it!!

After many days of watching the beautiful new Panda mom, hearing the baby demanding food and attention, I finally got to see the baby!! Mei Xiang, the panda momma, has been quite attentive to her newborn cub, and last night she seemed to know that millions (I don't know how many others are as odd as I am!) wanted to her see her beautiful baby. The baby was making noises that I've come to associate with hunger, and she rolled to sit up, and layed the cub for just a moment on the straw of her bed. She hovered, but sat there as if to say "Here's your chance!" and the people who take care of her-watching through the same camera feed I can ZOOOOMMMEEED in right away. The baby is all white I think, and sooo tiny! So helpless looking! I need to research more about pandas and cubs ;) But she let the baby lay there for a minute, and then picked it up, cuddling and nursing it. It was incredible! I'm such a nerd, but I love things like this. I don't do being "in" nature well, but I so love things like this. If you want to see too, Mei Xiang & baby. I haven't loved something this much since I watched the storks hatching last year on live camera!

Still here, I swear
As I have learned, dear friends-life moves onward. I've always known that, but it's never been demonstrated to me so clearly as it has these last few weeks. While my heart, and DH's would rather time just stand still, it can't. So--Onward (and upwards) I hope.

Having been newly Christian again now this past year, taking baby steps in my faith towards growth and knowledge, I never realized the comfort God could give. The strength and the warm feeling of being held. I am so grateful that the Lord is a loving God. The morning of Ray's memorial, I was driven to find a cross and necklace. I'd been searching for one for a while, but that day it seemed necessary. We found one, and I'd been wearing it ever since. Yesterday morning, it broke. The rope chain snapped. I was heart broken, nearly in tears. But my husband reminded me that the necklace was an outward and visible sign of an inward and perfect grace. He's right, of course (ya know I hate typing that!) I still feel odd without the necklace. I'm not sure if you can get rope chain's repaired, and even so we're doing way too much to keep our heads above water to do it.

I'm stitching again! Seem obsessed by it yet again, so this is a good thing. I have a lot of obligation stitching to catch up on, so I've been doing those here and there, trying to get things complete. THere is SO much I want to do and patterns I want to complete-I need to clone myself several times. I need a Chatelaine clone Angi, a Mirabilia clone Angi, I need a clone to finish The Minstrel from TW, and so on. BUT! I want like a Borg like mind link, so I get to experience the pleasure of stitching these charts too! I don't want much, eh ? :)

Well, it's time to take the alien to drama class (not sure she needs it, but hey) so off I go! Y'all be good to yourselves.

Into the Swing again...

We're trying to get back to life normal here, with laundry, housecleaning, cooking and the like. There's stuff to finish up from when we were gone, and just everyday life. I am doing the best I can at it.

I'm not dealing with all this as well as I would like. Maybe it's because this is the first time i've ever lost anyone I care about. I don't know... but that's how I feel-lost. We have no community here, really. No one to rally around. I did get a lovely sympathy card from Kari-thank you so much. I know the best way to get through this is just keep on keepin on. And I'm trying.

I have *no* urge to stitch, I have not much desire to read. I just want to sleep... and today am fighting the typical everyday headache i've been getting. But there are swim lessons to arrange, and meals to be cooked. Laundry isn't giving me a break either, so it's back to the grind I go.

Love well, and tell each other often.

A life well lived
65 years seems like a long time at times. Today, to me, 65 years isn't enough. My father-in-law passed away in the early hours of this morning. About ten minutes before 3 am. The family-his wife and three kids-were on their way, but Ray was too tired, and was ready to go home. He slipped away a few minutes before they got there to say goodbye. He'd fought for over a week against lungs that were continually filling with blood, for reasons we still do not know. He is at peace, and content now. It is the job of the living now to deal with the pain, and our loss.

I was only blessed with him in my life for 3 years or so. It's not been enough time, but it has been enough for me to love and cherish him as my own family. A man who welcomed my daughter and I into his family eagerly, willingly and with great love. A more wonderful FIL I couldn't have asked for, who gave hugs and comfort and reassurance to me on so many things.

Godspeed Ray. You will be missed deeply. I pray you watch over us. I love you.

Well, I knew it all along!

You scored as Faerie. Faerie: Aren't you a cute little flying person? Faeries are earth spirits. They live among each element completely hidden. They have cousins called Pixies. Pixies however, are very mischevious. They enjoy tormenting other creatures for fun. Little pranksters.. I hope you never meet one. Pixies have a bad reputation for finding a creature and clinging to them until death. Faeries can be somewhat close to a Pixie, but mostly they are loving, playful, and carry with them a child-like enthusiasm for life. Hide among the pedals of a Daisy, you are a Faerie. Faerie 75% Mermaid 58% Angel 58% WereWolf 42% Dragon 8% Demon 0% What Mythological Creature are you? (Cool Pics!) created with QuizFarm.com

Business....

Today's post is more buisness than pleasure... I've been away for so long.. but 2 things really. I am sure most people remember my talking about the Girl Scout camp, and the fight to keep it open. The Council allowed us to keep the camp open, but won't be redeeming any "cookie dough" (what the girls earned selling cookies) for actual money to the camp. The Camp is accepting cookie dough, but will have to fundraise to cover all that $. *sighs* When I first posted about all of this, several people had said they'd be interested in sending donations... if anyone still is interested, please email for the address. faerystitch @ metrocast . net

Second, since the boards are down, I'm posting my "for sale" list here. Paypal is preferred and shipping with vary with purchase. Thanks!
Hand dyed Fabrics:
Picture THis Plus:
Highland-13x18 28 Cashel $10

Sugar Maple Fabrics:
High Noon 13x18 Jubilee 28 $7
Lapus-13x18 28 Jazlyn Opalescent $10
Griffon-18x26 Belfast $18
Mystic Glade-18x26 Belfast $18

Original TBN:
Rosebud 28 Cashel 18x26 - $20
Seamist 32 Belfast 18x26 - $20

Stitches and Spice (Australian company)
Moonshadows-18x26 Jobelan 28 $13

Kiwi Illusions:
Rimu 28 Lugana 18x26 $14

Silkweaver:
Sundown 28 ct LInen 9x13 -$3
Tan 36 ct Linen 9x13 $3

Charts:
Dragon Dreams-here Be Dragons $6
Enchanting Lair- Queen's Rule $5
Pawprintings- Renaissance $9
Pawprintings- Malachite-Blackwork Beginnings $8
Sweetheart Tree Kit-Fancy Heart $12
M Designs-Insect Sampler (pretty) $4
TW Designworks- Celtic Inspiration Collection - $7
Patricia Allison-Summer Sun-$5
Stoney Creek Collection-Frightfully Friendly Stitches Book 304-$6
Stardust-Snowbirds $6
Stardust-Come All Ye Faithful $6

I've not disappeared...

Just really busy... and I wanted to let Kari, Dana, Cathy, and Sharon all know I've seen the tags, and I'm trying to get the entries done...I promise this week, somehow.

Take care of yourselves...

What a whirlwind few days!
Wow, it's been a busy couple of days here!! I haven't updated (not really) in close to a week, and what a week it's been! Between church activities, Tory's softball, Brownies, etc-I'm suprised I can breathe! I've really been thinking about the whole Girl Scout thing, and I don't think I'm going to return next year as a leader. I've loved every second of what I've done this year, but there's some things going on with my own kid that my being so busy affects badly. So I'll be trying to figure out exactly what will be best in the next few weeks.

Tory had her first softball game on Friday nite. They are a rookie team, so it's coach pitching. They did really well! I was so proud of them. Some girls on both teams still needed to use the tee, for confidence, but the teams had a great time!
She was supposed to have her second game on Sat, but it got rained out. Is it EVER going to get warm ???

Saturday the kiddo started getting sick-not sure if it's caused by her new meds, or by a tummy bug. She's still got it today so we're off to the dr at 11:30. I doubt we'll make it to choir and softball practice tonight then.

The most exciting thing that happened this weekend was winning tickets off the radio station to go see 3 Doors Down in Manchester! It was pure luck, trust me! It was one of those "be the tenth caller" things, and I won! We were just pulling out of the softball game, so I was lucky I even had cell service!!

I found out though, that at the same arena Def Leppard is touring with Tesla. *sighs* When I was younger, I wanted to see Bon Jovi and Def Leppard more than anything. I've seen Bon Jovi, and it would be just $110 (2 tickets, all ticketmaster fees inc.) to see them WITH Tesla!! If I just sold 5 more fobs lol! Ahh well, it'd be nice, and it's really cool I won tickets to 3 Doors Down!

Off to get the kiddo ready for the dr's! You take care now!

Mystery 8 progress!!

So here is my progress on Chatelain's Mystery 8.  I'm officially through 1/4th of part 3.  I still have to do part 4 and 5 before June 1st to be all caught up!  Somehow I doubt that is happening!

Goooood Friday morning!
As I sit here waiting for my tea to finish steeping, so I can have my first burst of caffiene for the day, I marvel at something. I'm really tired. I didn't get to sleep until after 2am. This used to happen a lot, but now it's become so rare I could hardly believe it myself!

I STITCHED!!! Until 2 am!!!! I didn't even want to go to bed *then* but my eyes were crossing and my body was shutting down on me. Now, I was working on Mystery 8, so you can't tell I did 4 hours on it... but *I* Can!

We met with our rector yesterday to start the process for our 're-wedding' in July. Hopefully I can catch our music director soon--I want to ask if he'll play the harp! We're just going to have this done during regular Sunday morning services, which my rector was quite excited about!

From there it was off to the stitching social. Dd was relatively well behaved, but I don't think I'll go back to the Thursday socials. Just a feeling I get that I shouldn't if I have DD. Not everyone has patience with kids, and no everyone has to put up with them... so. :)

I haven't gotten any orders in my pampered chef catalog party *sigh* Ahh well. I'm not supposed to close it until May 22, but I doubt it will be necessary.

Today is grocery shopping day. Figures that it's the first day all week that the sun is out, and there is the *possibility* I could do yardwork. Humph. Stupid weather!

Y'all take care!

In Pursuit of Perfection...
I was talking to 2 of my best friends on IM last night, something I haven't had tons of time to do lately. I'd just gotten home from a long day, tucked the alien into bed and was settling down to do my computer stuff-check email, check on the boards I admin, balance the checkbook *blech*, etc. Between both conversations, the subjects turned to life's stresses and how we deal with them. One artsy friend is stressing about her husband's anniversary present, another bright friend is struggling with some personal issues.

I have developed over the last couple of months a much different outlook on life. It's not something I've been really public about, due to it being a massive change from my former beliefs. My family and I started going to church again--the Episcopal church. It has made such a difference in our lives. Most of my life I had felt failed by God and fellow Christians...failed in situations that happened quite a long time ago. I'd been feeling tugged by certain situations over the last 2 years--I describe it now as God had me on a fishing reel, and was slowly pulling me in. It has made such an infinite difference in how I view stressors-money, kids, friends, time, schedules. I spend a lot of time in prayer-although I don't think my prayer is much like anyone else's. I have an incredible pair of rectors at my church, one of whom is female. Heath is one of those people that literally to me, glows with the joy of God, with the calling to minister. If you're interested, here's the link to my parish. St. Pauls Church of Concord NH

It's become so important to us as a family, that we are having our marriage officially blessed by the church this summer. None of our parents nor most of our family were able to make our quick civil wedding in November of 2003. All of our family are coming, and we've worked it out so it's right about when both kids' birthdays are! How's that for scheduling! I've never been baptised, so I'm in the middle of confirmation classes, and will be baptised and confirmed on June 12th. DD has joined the children's choir, and loves every minute of it!

So I realized-- my life in some areas is little better than in the past. We still struggle with getting my support checks in time, DH and I have still had some epic fights, stretching the budget still sucks up so much of time and energy, and then there's DD's behaviours. She's the love of my life, but the greatest challenge of it as well. And I realized recently, my stressors didn't really change--I changed. I changed how I react, how I plan and how I deal. I changed, not the situations. I'm sure it sounds hokey, and trite, and canned--but I have a greater strength now. I'm not dealing with my stressors alone anymore... I have help. I have God beside me... carrying me when I need it most. I've missed this feeling of peace all my life, and I'm slowly regaining it. And Thank God.

Wait, where did spring go?
As I dig out from beneath the blankets and down comforter this morning, my teeth chattering and absolutely dreading stepping on my bare floor, I can't help but wonder--Where the heck did spring go???

Two weeks ago we had temps in the low to mid 60's, night temps the mid to high 40's. All was decently well with my world. At one point I even contemplated packing away the source of fuzzy-warm goodness (the down comforter, not DH). Boy am I glad I was a bit lazy that day!!

It's school vacation week, which means let's *hope* DD makes it ;) Actually we have a bunch of stuff planned-just no Brownie activities since all the kids are off school. It's odd not seeing the girls :)

A door closed yesterday, and that was hard. I am glad though that I took the steps I took. At class last week, we were discussing maxims. We all passed them around, and when one struck you in particular, you kept the board and then read it and spoke about it. Mine was the one about forgiveness-not seven times seven.. but seventy times seven. That is always so hard for me, a struggle to see past the hurts and the words. It's a big thing for DH and I, and between my parents and I. But I spent a lot of time in prayer yesterday and last night, and this morning I can say... I forgive. I've already said I'm sorry. I've done what I need to do for my own peace.

Ya'll take care :)

Monday, Schmunday...

It doesn't feel like Monday. That would probably be because my DD has the week off of school, so I got to sleep until the ripe ole time of 8:30 am. The alien girlchild just woke up (it's nearly 9). I also have the overgrown boychild here, attitude and all. He's also off school. *insert hair pulling icon here*

The weekend was interesting, in an odd, head-tilting sort of way. Friday nite was DD's first softball practice, and as the team is "coach-less", all the parents agreed to drill the kids. It was fun actually!. Saturday was DD's psych appt--as I suspected, the dr. doubled her meds. *sighs* I am truly praying this will help, as twice this week I've gotten 2 page notes about her actions. Sunday I didn't have class at church, and it seemed to throw everyone's day off. We all sorta didn't know what to do, to top it off-it was raining outside.

I stitched some too, not much. Infinitely more than I have been, however. Two stitches would have been more than I have been. I got chocolate in the mail too, from the UK. My favorite kind. I was confused there for a while too, and part of me confesses, perhaps a little hopeful. *smiles* I shouldn't have been either confused, or hopeful. Seems my receipt of this delight was set up ages ago, and not what I thought it might have been. Ahhh well.

I'm not going to be able to get my yard work done this week, if this dratted rain doesn't go away!!! I had big plans...*thumbs her nose at the rain*

Ya'll have a great day!

Wow--a long break

And boy did I need it! But things are sorta settling back into place these days, except for the filled dates in my datebook... one of the reasons I've not updated in quite some time is that, well, I've been busy. I got a real honest to goodness life--something I've been gently told and sarcastically suggested to many times.

Since you've seen me last here is a short list of things I've been doing:
-Buying a new van! We finally have a second car, and thanks to a buy-here pay-here place, we were able to afford a *much* nicer car than we thought. We ended up getting a 2001 Ford Windstar with relatively low miles! I have a mini-van now! I'm a true soccer/softball mom/Girl Scout leader now! :) And the icing on the cake is that the van is *silver* *Squeeeeee* I've only had the van for 13 days, but I'm not sure how we've lived without another car for so long!!!
-Getting DD into therapy to try and stabalize her. She's also on new medicine, with a new stricter regime here at home and school. She is most likely an early onset bi-polar disorder (and we won't even touch on how much I ache with guilt because of my genetics). She is slowly evening out, but it's been a rough 2 months.
-Focusing on a friend who is in an abusive marriage. She has been pretty fragile, and I've been spending every available moment with her--she's getting stronger thought, and hopefully will be ready to change her situation soon. I'm so so so proud of her!!
-Hitting hyper-drive with Girl Scout activties. We have meetings *every* Tuesday now, and there aren't many Saturdays we don't have something planned in the end of the year crush. We're also planning a kick-butt fly-up/bridging ceremony.
-Having nearly *every* day booked in my planner-softball, brownies, school trips, church functions, classes. I'm so seriously busy, but I'm SO seriously loving it!!
-Gathering information and support in the PTO--I'm running for secretary for this next year. It's going to be a blast!!!

That's the cliff notes version of my life lately... The rest of it is awesome! My marriage is healthy and strong, my children are improving slowly with commitment and work. I've got flowers to plant, and am focusing on getting our yard in shape. I've become a better housekeeper, a better mother, a better wife, and a better friend--at least I think. But the bottom line in my feeling is... I've become a better me. I'm happier and more stable than I can ever remember being, and I thank God for it.

So... I must run! Oh-yes. What you see very *little* of on there is stitching. *sighs* I have lost my desire for it... it's more effort lately I think than it's worth. I don't know why, or if i'll ever be in love with it like I have been. I hope so, since I have tons of things I want to finish. We'll see how I figure out how to cope with that. It's the only shadow in my happiest of happy days lately. I'm working on it...because if I don't fall back in love with it, I'm going to need to sell all this stuff!!!LOL

Have a *great* day, take care of yourself!

Yeah, I'm done with that..
It’s February alright. I’m tired of snow and cold (yet another 8 inches of snow on Monday). The annual BB blow-ups are occurring. I’m tired of the colour white—thank God I haven’t tried to stitch on anything white. I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t succeed. The hereditary Seasonal Affective Disorder is starting to seriously kick my ass every year, which is no surprise. I’ve watched it get worse and worse in my mom over the years. I’m hanging on to my bi-polar management by a very thin thread. Which brings me to my point today, my topic. There are some things that I’ve just decided I’m done with. I’m through thinking about them. I’m seriously over talking about them. And I’m DONE worrying about them.

1. My aborted trip to Nashville: It was sad, and painful. But in the grand scheme of things, it wasn’t a major catastrophe. I don’t know who caused the issues. I will never know. Now, I’m done with worrying or thinking about it. I refuse to speculate, or try and figure it out. It’s impossible. It can’t be figured out by any other means than calling Nashville organizes and demanding the information. And you know what? It’s NOT worth it. I really don’t care who it was anymore. What I care about most was the amazing show of support, love and commiseration I got from so many on the board. I was able to see how I’m truly seen by those I respect, and even by those who don’t really know me. It was incredible, and I was in tears of joy more than tears of sorrow when I saw that many see me as honorable, with integrity and honesty. That means more to me than a trip. So I’m done with that.

2. Board controversy & strife: I’m learning I can’t fix everything, even if I’m friends with all parties involved. I’m learning it’s not my JOB to try and keep things smoothed out. My only responsibilities are what *I* say and do. Therefore, I will only concentrate on my own actions and reactions. I will not involve myself in personal conflicts and problems. I will love my friends, and learn about and get to know new people. I will cultivate patience (don’t choke, I’m seriously trying). I will actually concentrate on *stitching* on the stitching boards. Imagine how much more stitching I will get done.

3. Closed-mindedness: You might think this is more centered in number 2, but in reality I’ve just about had it with this in my everyday life as well. I’m done worrying about or freaking out about closed minded people. If you aren’t open to new ideas, that’s not my problem-and that was the “collective you” I’m referring to. I’m open to all SORTS of ideas… if I wasn’t, I’d never have found half of my friends on the boards, I’d never have branched into specialty stitches, and I sure as hell wouldn’t have taken over my daughter’s Brownie Troop.

4. My house: I’m done worrying about the fact I’m not Martha Stewart or June Cleaver. My house is lived in and damn messy. It’s a piece of crap house that’s falling apart. I can’t fix it all right now. I can’t fix it all tomorrow. I’m taking it one day at a time, and I’m done apologizing for it.

I’m sure there’s more for my list if I really think about it. But right now I’m having my own little crisis in my Brownie troop involving some missing tickets for Disney on Ice this Friday. I seriously have some more important things to do right now.

Y’all take care of yourselves. No one else will. :)

It's been a week
One full of ups and downs, to be sure. I think I'm on some cosmic junket with regards to health. I was sick, probably 98% of December. It was awful. January and up until this last week have been good, relatively smooth. I should have known the train was coming back around. Last week it was headaches and sinus stuff. This week it's still that, but throw in a UTI for fun. yeah... anything but. So I'm sick again, what's new--what's next.

I've been stitching...got a great portion of Mystery 8 part 2 done, and I'm officially done with Part 1 except the beading. *wahooo!* Chatelaines are going to be the death of me, but OH what a way to go!

Ya'll take care of yourselves :)

Not as okay as I thought...
So the Nashville reports have started, and The designs being released this time are lovely and more incredible than I thought. As I sat looking through the various pictures, reports, etc last night... I realized that I'm not as "okay" with what happened as I thought I was. By no means does that indicate any upset with my LNS, at ALL. I would NEVER have been upset with their business decision, and I agree with it 100%. It is the vile, small, jealous person who used a lie to strip this from me that is the direction of my fury.
It truly isn't that I didn't get to go see all the new designs first--but more that I wasn't able to meet people I admire, and friends of my heart. My LNS owner ran into Jennifer Aikmen-Smith of Dragon Dreams waiting for her shuttle on Friday morning. Which means I would have been in the same hotel. I *love* Dragon Dreams designs, I have at least 35 of them (which is not holding a *candle* to Misty, but hey). It would have been a dream to sit and chat with her (and to feel like a pudgy hobbit next to her! LOL). Or meeting Nan Caldera of Just Nan. Wow, would I have been overjoyed. Her band sampler charts (I have nearly 100 of her designs in my stash) have brought me so much stitching joy, and were the push I needed to really learn to stitch specialty stitches. I regret that I wasn't able to thank her in person. It would have been lovely to see Jo Fisher again, and to see in person how she finished the model I did for her, the Celtic Birth Sampler. It was the first model I'd done for a designer of a design no one else had seen. I enjoyed every second of it. And to be able to shake hands with the Fantasy Queen Herself, Teresa Wentzler--I have met her once before at CATS Hershey. She is from a town very close to where I grew up. I totally bungled my first meeting with her.. she's so much taller than her chart pictures look! She is a lovely graceful lady, and my treasured picture with her was lost with my computer crashed. I had had hopes of taking another. *smiles*
And then, there's the friends of the heart that I missed out on. Dana (thutmosis) has been such a sweet, dear friend. I think I was almost more excited to meet her finally! Wendy, whose birthday I have missed now Happy Birthday Wendy!. She and her husband were coming to meet me-I was going to have a surprise for her! Tastykake snacks-from Pennsylvania. A favourite childhood treat for both of us. Cheryl (momstitches) was there too. I would have loved to see her beautiful stitching, and meet her face to face.
Ah well. No, I'm not as okay as I thought. I will be, and I struggle to come to terms with some things that I am trying to teach my daughter. Life is not fair. Truth doesn't always win. People can be very cruel. Protect your heart.
Take care of yourselves.

More Lessons...
For a quasi New Year's resolution..I decided I needed to be more of a presence on the various BB's I'm a part of. I used to be quite active, and then quite some time ago, my life pretty much fell apart--it boiled over to my board presence and I disappeared. When I came back, I stayed low... quiet. Out of sight, out of mind, so to speak. I have friends and acquaintances I would speak to in email, or AIM or Yahoo. But I would rarely post on boards, and very *rarely* start a thread. So..this year, I decided I should be more involved in this community that has given much to me. Meet new people, be more vocal.

I'm learning that wasn't such a good resolution. It opens me up to new people and new ideas, yes. It also opens me up to disapproval, pain, and anger. The lesson I learned today is that I can't react rationally when I feel someone is trying to tell me how to parent my child, when they don't *know* my child. Or commenting on my child's behaviour, when they don't really know her, or seem to listen to descriptions of her. Especially if those people either don't have children, or (like my parents) raised their kids long ago. That isn't the other people's fault, to be sure. I have little ability to put distance between myself and the subject... I'm not sure how much distance I would *want* to put there in dealing with her. Parenting a severe ADHD child can test saints, and is far beyond the realm of regular parenting. Trust me, I'm no saint nor am I any way, shape or form a candidate for Mother of the Year. But I love my daughter, and keep trying to find ways to help her grow and mature.

For now, though... I think subjects dealing with my daughter need to stay *off* the boards.

A Lesson to be learned...
Isn't that what your parents told you after any disappointment in your life? Or after something that was perhaps very painful? I know my mom told me that everytime, and often. There was a lesson to be learned in my first heartbreak, and another being the only fat, unpopular girl in my class. If you asked me the ultimate event I learned a "lesson" from, it would have been my 16th birthday party. I am a summer baby, which meant I had to give invitations at the end of school, and hope people remembered. They didn't. I stood in my pink & white decorated basement, and was crushed. Not Surprised, mind you, but crushed. Until this week, I would have said that was close to the most unfair "lesson" I'd ever had to learn.

Until this week. I am working very hard at trying to find the "good" in what's happened to me this week. Perhaps it is that my daughter obviously needed me, and therefore it's good I didn't get to go to Nashville. Perhaps it was the snowstorm moving in, or something I don't yet know. But there must be *something*, right? Because otherwise the complete and utter unfairness of what someone did to me this week will forever live in memory as the "worst" lesson learned. I did nothing wrong, and yet was accused of things that most who know me, know I wouldn't do. I am missing the opportunity to meet people I refer to as "family of the heart", and it is basically because of someone who either hates me - personally or for the chance I was getting, or someone so petty and worried about competition they would willingly say something not only untrue, but VERY destructive about me. That is what makes me hurt, and angry. It was SO CLEAR I wasn't doing what I was accused of, but yet it didn't stop someone from making an accusation. The snowball effect was .... painful. People I've come to care about felt perhaps trapped, perhaps nervous--and made the only decision they could have--one in fact that I would have insisted upon, had I known about the problem. But it still hurts I won't get to meet Dana, or Wendy, or perhaps Cheryl. I am sorry, to all of you for the disappointment. I'm grateful, too, for the support and sweet kind words I've read. It helps to know that people really do believe I am honorable, and act with integrity. That helps so much.

I wanted to rave and cry about the unfairness of life--but it is what it is. People I wanted to 'take care of' with my attention to detail on this trip will still mostly be taken care of. The quiet time I desperately needed will *sorta* come on Saturday. Today, my angelbaby and I are having a "mental health" day. We might have another one tomorrow. I *want* to have a massive retail therapy spree, but being the responsible, bill paying adult I've become (snorts) I can't do that. Not that I *need* more stash anyways. I am trying to soothe my soul in other ways. I am concentrating on the positive. I'm giving my little girl LOTS of hugs. There's not much else I can do, but I'm working on making that enough.

Ya'll take care of yourselves, K ? **hugs* to you all.

A Finish for me!
I have done a model this year for DinkyDyes, a teeny finish for a gift (2"x2")and now I've finished a WIP that was a gift to me from a dear friend. This one is all mine! I proudly present Just Nan's Pearl Orchid.

Well, you chose to move there!
If you know me, even slightly, you know I'm not an outdoors person. There's a lot of other things I'm *not* on a serious basis, like a morning person, but I'm really not an outdoors person. When it's summer, there's bugs, and the heat, when it's springtime, there's the hatching spiders and the rain... in the autumn, after the gorgeous colours-all those leaves fall, bringing in ants, and mess. But there's a special season reserved for the most direct loathing, in my eyes.

Winter. Cold. Snow. Freezing temperatures, slippery roads, people driving either so conservatively they are a menace, or people driving without a seeming care in the world, which is a whole different type of danger. Snow... that really pretty white stuff... I like to see it on the trees, on the yard, perhaps even on the house. But isn't there something that could be done about it falling on the roads ? Did I mention cold? I am not a good "cold" person. I whine. I moan. I hibernate. Yes, I am much like a big fat bear, in more ways than one.

So... hating winter as I do, and cold, and definately snow..WHY am I living in New Hamster .. I mean New Hampshire? Home of the Frozen North (sorta). Where this year alone we've already had about 30 inches of snow? THIRTY INCHES. probably a bit more. Where today, when my child has off school, and I have a full day of errands, stitch-shopping-where she was going to start learning to stitch, and I was going to get to spend time at my awesome LNS, take my bright child to lunch at Pizza Hut where she gets a free pizza for being an awesome reader, and grocery shopping (yes I'm one of those nuts that enjoys grocery shopping)... today when I have ALL that planned, scheduled and happily plotted, it dumps FIVE INCHES of SNOW on me overnight. Not just snow. Heavy, WET wnow. All the schools in the area are delayed. NH got a sucker punch surprise, no one was really prepared for it. Beautiful.

So, why am I here ? Well women have done stupider things for Love. My DH lived here when I met him, and I moved here, for Love. While a noble reason (and I love my DH and adore our married life, my life being infinitely better now) I really think I didn't plot that out all the well. True Love is blind they say... I disagree. Right now, True Love is just damned cold and buried under snow.